The Christmas Shoes for Addison
by Jerkface-Allyface
Summary: What happenes when Addison gets sick? How will their family survive? And more importantly, how will she survive? Maddison. By Ally.
1. A hard Day at Work

**The Christmas Shoes for Addison**

"_It was almost Christmas time; there I stood in another line  
trying to buy that last gift or two, not really in the Christmas mood."_

Addison walked off the subway and, towards the escalator. When she made her way up to the busy streets of New York City, she walked through crowds of people and, headed in the direction of her son's school. As she was waiting for Owen to come out of the building, her mind began to reflect on the days events.

She had; had back to back surgeries all day and, had been on call the night before. It was physically obvious how exhausted she was. Addison rubbed her tired eyes and, began to recall the fight she and Mark had gotten into the day before. She hadn't been feeling well for awhile and, had fought countless times with her husband; as to whether or not she needed to see a doctor.

"_Addison, come on. Please be more reasonable about this!" Mark screamed at the closed door in front of him. "More reasonable about what Mark? It's my body, and I will take care of it myself!" Addison yelled back. Mark could hear his wife crying, and wanted desperately to go hold her and comfort her. But she had locked the door, so he decided to let her alone for awhile. _

Addison's thought were interrupted when she saw Owen running toward her. She pulled her eight year old into a tight hug, as he began to tell his mother about his day. Addison pulled away from her son, and stood up. "Mommy, how was your day?" Owen asked his mother. "It was….busy." Addison said, not wanting to go into too much detail. "That's good." Her son replied. Addison took hold of Owen's hand as the two began to walk away from the school. She walked too the subway out of habit, but was clearly lost in thought.

When Addison opened the door to the brownstone apartment, Owen ran in right behind her. He threw his school stuff on the floor, and ran towards the television. "Owen Riley that is not where your school things go, please go put them in your room." Addison told the young boy. Owen did what he was told. Addison went to the couch, and lay down; she quickly drifted off to sleep.

Ten minutes later Owen was shaking his mother awake. "Mom, I'm hungry." He said, and gave her the puppy dog lips. Addison sat up on the couch, "okay what sounds good for dinner?" She asked him. "I want pizza." Owen said. "Okay" Addison answered and began to stand up. She would have fallen over at that moment if it hadn't been for the table in front of her. She grabbed onto the table, and balanced herself. "Mommy? Are you okay?" Owen asked, slightly confused. It took Addison a second to reply, but she did with a simple "Yes baby, I am just tired."

After dinner Owen was sitting at the kitchen table doing his homework. Addison was on the phone, when Mark walked into the apartment. "Daddy!" Owen screamed running over into Mark's arms. "Hey buddy." His eyes wondered over to his wife, who was sitting on the counter in sweats and a sweatshirt. She was on the phone and was clearly frustrated. When she looked over at him, she thanked the person on the phone and hung up. "Hey, how was your day?" He asked her, but was interrupted by Owen. "Dad, did you come home because mommy is sick?" The child asked. "No, Owen. Why do you think mommy is sick?" Mark asked his son. "Because she…" Owen started. "I'm fine." Addison finished for him.

That night after Mark had put their son to bed, he walked into the bedroom, where Addison was sitting on the bed reading. "Addie, are you really okay?" Mark started to ask. "I…I don't know. I made a doctors appointment for tomorrow, and Savvy agreed to pick O up from school, so that you can come with me. Mark noticed the scared look in her eyes. He raped his arms around her and kissed her cheek. "Everything will be okay baby."

"_Standing right in front of me was a little boy waiting anxiously  
Pacing 'round like little boys do  
and in his hands he held a pair of shoes"_


	2. The Diagnosis

**The Diagnosis **

Addison and Mark were sitting in the waiting room, at the doctor's office. They had been waiting for almost and hour and, Mark was getting inpatient. Just then Addison's name was called. "Dr. Montgomery-Slone." Addison looked over at Mark, who grabbed her hand and, they both walked into the office together.

The doctor drew some of Addison's blood, after having asked some questions. Now it was just Mark and Addison in the small exam room. There were posters on the walls of, the endocrine system and other body systems. Marks eyes wondered to the poster on the door, that was a picture of a new born baby with its mother. He looked over at Addison who was staring down at her feet. "Want to have another baby?" Mark asked his wife. Addison looked up at him. Her eyes tear stained. "What?" she asked. "Do you, Addison, want to have another baby?" Mark asked again. "Mark, you can't be serious. I could be really sick, and you are asking me if I want to have another child?" Addison replied. "Well I was just, I don't know. I thought maybe you would. I'm sorry." Just then the doctor walked back into the room.

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"So, what is it? What's wrong with Addison?" Mark asked as soon as the door opened, Addison just looked into the doctor's eyes. She knew the look all too well. It was the look that all doctors's got when the news wasn't good. She took a deep breath in an attempt to prepare herself for what she was about to hear. "Addison has an advanced case of Pancreatic Cancer." The doctor said with an apologetic look on his face. Mark's face feel. "What, what does this mean?" he asked. He looked over at Addison who showed no emotions, but refused to look at Mark. "How did this happen?" Mark asked the doctor again. "Well, this type of cancer occurs most often in people with diabetes, but since Addison is not diabetic, then it could be a genetic issue. If anyone in her extended family has had it, or a history of Ovarian and Colon cancers.

Addison looked up at the doctor. "I…I need to get out of here. Thank you so much for your help." She said. "Addison, we need to talk about starting treatment right away. "I am a doctor, I know my options. Thank you." Addison got up and left the room. Leaving Mark in the room with a confused look on his face, He thanked the doctor and promised to call within the next two days.

Mark walked out to the parking lot, finding Addison sitting in the car, with tears in her eyes. He got in the drivers seat, and looked at her. "Mark, I don't want to talk right now, can we please just go home? I want to see Owen." Mark nodded his head and started the car.

When they got home, Savvy was sitting at the kitchen table helping her god son with his homework. When she saw the look on Addison's face, and the concern in Mark's eyes, she knew that this appointment had not gone well. She stood up, when Addison walked over to where her little boy was sitting. Addison didn't even look at Savvy; she just kissed Owen on the forehead, and sat down next to him. Savvy looked at Mark, who was also watching Addison.

Mark led Savvy into the other room, and while turning around to look at Addison again, she followed him. "Mark, what happened?" She asked. "Pancreatic Cancer." Mark answered.

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	3. Time to Face the Truth

**Time to Face the Truth**

Addison woke up the next morning, with a sick feeling in her stomach. Vomiting and nausea were only two of the symptoms that she now faced. Along with Lower abdomen and back pain, loss of her appetite and, weakness. She looked at herself in the mirror and hated what she saw.

After she was dressed, she made sure that her husband and son where still sound asleep in their beds, and she left the house. Her first stop was Central Park, where she was going to meet Savvy to talk. As she was waiting for Savvy to arrive, she could already feel the tears welling in her eyes. "What am I going to do?" She thought to herself. "I am so...I am unfinished. Owen needs me, and well Mark…heavens knows he could never raise a child on his own." She continued to have these thoughts until she felt a hand on her shoulder.

She looked up to see Savvy, bearing coffee. "Hey." She simply said. "Hey sweetie." Savvy replied handing Addison the coffee.

"So, Addie . . . how are you?" Savvy asked. "Well honestly Sav, I am, I am scared shitless. What if I can't beat it? Owen, he needs me, he needs his mother. And Mark, well you and I both know that he can't raise a child on his own. I am so unfinished. And I am confused and, I am, I am just so scared. Addison said, she could feel the hot tears running down her face. "Oh Addie." Savvy reached out to hug her best friend. "Honey, you can't think like that. You have too look at the bright side. You will beat this cancer's ass I know you will. Because you are Addison and, you are strong and, and you will survive this.

Addison looked at the woman sitting next to her. She had known her for as long as she could remember, and had always been there for her. Really she was like a sister. "Savvy, will you come with me to the doctor? I don't want to go alone, but I am not ready to talk to Mark about anything yet." Savvy agreed, but made Addison promise she would talk to her husband soon.

The two women were sitting in the exam room, waiting for the doctor to come in. "Savvy." Addison began. "Yeah Ad?" "Mark asked me yesterday, if I wanted to have another baby. It was before we found out about the cancer, and I didn't really answer him. And now the answer that he and I both want isn't what I can give him. I missed my chance. I want another child, I do." Addison said on the verge of tears.

The doctor walked into the small room. "Hello, Dr. Montgomery-Sloan. Shall we get started?" he asked. Addison took a deep breath and nodded her head. Savvy took hold of Addison's hand and squeezed it. "Your options are: _**Distal pancreatectomy**_, since the tumor is in the tail of the pancreas, they will also remove the body of the pancreas. It is an extensive operation, and depending on how well it goes, you may or may not have to be on insulin therapy for the rest of your life. If you chose the surgery you will be sedated with a feeding tube for about a week. The feeding tube will be taken out after a few weeks. And although the doctors may not be able to get the whole tumor out, this could put the cancer into remission. Even though Addison already knew all of this, she nodded her head as the doctor spoke. The refreshment was good, and Savvy needed to know what was happening. "Your other option would be Chemo Therapy, but with you being a doctor, and the cancer being at such an advanced stage, I think you know that surgery is your best choice."

Addison and Savvy were now sitting in traffic, on their way back to the brownstone. "I am going to get the surgery." Addison stated. Addison switched lanes and turned the car, in the direction away from the brownstone. "Addie, where are you going?" Savvy asked. "Owen needs a mother, and the sooner I get the operation, the better chance of survival I have. So we are going to the hospital, and I am going to look up surgeons. I need the best there is. Addison's eyes teared up when she thought about the 40 survival rate, even for those who receive the surgery and best medical care available. She knew that this was going to be hard to beat, but she had to be strong for Mark and Owen.


End file.
